The Spark Behind the Word ‘Essential’: Before the Wounds: Remembering the Essential Me

Essential - Absolutely necessary; extremely important elements of something.

“Essential” is a small word with major authority. It doesn't just suggest it demands.

It tells us what matters most, whether we're talking health, happiness, or coffee.

The best part? What’s essential changes depending on the person, the mood, or the day making it a word that’s both universal and personal.

As I sit with the question, “Who was I before the wounds?”, I find myself traveling back through time to the 3-year-old, the 10-year-old, the 14-year-old, the 16-year-old versions of me. Each of these ages holds pivotal moments in my story moments shaped by trauma, some so painful that my heart, or maybe my mind (I still can’t say which), chose to bury them.

I wouldn’t fully recall those moments until much later after I got married. Then, like an unexpected wave, the memories began to surface. I didn’t have the language at the time to explain what was happening. I just knew I was being triggered. And suddenly, those rare moments those strange emotional floods started to make sense.

Even now, as an adult, I’ve faced fresh trauma that seems to trace a curving line back to my childhood. If I mapped them out, the past and present would connect not in a straight line, but in a winding path marked by pain, growth, and becoming.

It’s murky at times, looking back. Trying to see who I was before the wounds. But deep down, I know I’ve always been me.

The essential me is:

• Forgiving sometimes to a fault, honestly.

• Loving and kind.

• Artistic, creative, and a daydreamer with stories dancing in my mind.

• Uniquely different, and proud of it even when others didn’t quite understand me.

As a child, I wanted to be a counselor or a teacher. I admired how my teachers listened to me, made me feel seen and heard. I wanted to give that gift to others. And while I may not hold a license or certification, I’ve lived into that calling in my own way through encouraging others, creating safe spaces, and choosing compassion.

People used to say, “I’m not who I used to be,” and I used to repeat it, too. But now, I understand it more deeply.

I’m not what I used to be but what I used to be, and what I went through, helped shape the dignity, character, and quiet strength within me.

And that is ESSENTIAL.

Thank you for reading. If this reflection resonated with you, I invite you to share it or reflect on the question yourself: Who were you before the wounds? And what parts of that person still live in you today?

The Spark Behind the Word ‘Enough’: When God Said I Was Already Whole

Enough - a word that holds quiet strength. It speaks of worthiness, sufficiency, and the profound truth that nothing more is needed to be valued.
Whole - a word that reminds us of completeness, that nothing is lacking, even when we feel shattered.

For a long time, I didn’t understand what it truly meant to be enough or whole. Learning to embrace these truths meant I had to love every part of me, even the hidden parts I was too ashamed to speak aloud. The thoughts I buried. The pain I silenced. The memories that made my stomach churn and left me feeling unworthy, invisible, or too much.

Without using the language, we often hear today words like trauma or brokenness I still carried those heavy beliefs. Deep down, I always felt something was missing. Subconsciously, I moved through life unaware that I didn’t see myself as whole, even though God had already declared that over me.

It was through scripture and my lived experiences with God that I came to understand I was created whole from the beginning. Not lacking. Not incomplete. Just... whole. So where in my story did, I start believing I wasn’t? For me, it started in my youth. In my teens. I didn’t know it then, but I began to absorb false narratives quiet lies that formed from comparison, rejection, and misunderstanding.

Even though I was always different, I found strength in that difference. I found peace in it. But I also discovered the deep influence of words on how they could shape or shatter a soul. “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” a nice rhyme, but a lie from the pit of hell. Words do hurt. They leave marks we don’t always see... but we feel them every time we look in the mirror and repeat what someone else said about us.

That’s why I’ve reclaimed the power of the words I choose to speak to myself and the ones I allow to be spoken over me. That reclamation led me to this blog today. Because every word has a spark behind it. And that spark either ignites hope and movement, or it keeps us stuck in our pain, repeating cycles that were never meant to define us.

So, I ask you:
What’s the spark behind the word for you?
Is it helping you rise or keeping you bound?
It’s time to speak words that free, words that heal, words that restore.

Because you, too, are already enough. Already whole. Just as He created you to be.